Nothing weird is happening.
She just wants to make sure I’m comfortable.
Maybe she fluffs the pillow. Maybe she pulls the blanket up to my chin. Maybe she leaves a glass of water on the nightstand and tells me not to stay up too late.
Your mom is a very thoughtful woman.
Honestly, it’s kind of weird that you’re making this sexual.
Soft. Comfortable. Cozy enough to sleep peacefully despite the irreversible damage this shirt will do to your buddy’s mental health.
Wear it to the barracks. Wear it on deployment. Wear it while yawning dramatically and announcing, “Well, I better get to bed. Your mom worries.”
Warning: May cause immediate rage, frantic calls home, and repeated demands to explain why the fuck you know what his childhood bedroom looks like.
Relax, bro.
She even left the hallway light on for me.
$25.00
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